- Societal expectations of masculinity
- Societal expectations to provide for women
- No long term reversible male birth control
- Men who are raped are more likely to remain silent and be dismissed or outright laughed at
- Unfair treatment in child custody battles
- No support for male victims of domestic abuse
- Media portrayal of married men as weak morons
Not men’s issues
- The friend zone
- Women not dating you
2. Doing pushups. (Do not attempt while binding.)
3. Cleaning my room, usually while muttering to myself about how a clean room has something to do with masculinity. (It doesn’t. It does have something to do with being a functional person for many people, but that’s not a gender thing. That said, if conflating masculinity and cleanliness does it for you and keeps the demons away, go for it. It’s also better than the Patriarchy’s conflation of masculinity and violence/sexism/rape/smelling bad/penises.)
4. Purchasing and using grooming things coded as masculine. I own two kinds of aftershave. I have a full beard and shave only about 3 inches of my neck. There is no practical reason for me to have two kinds of aftershave.
5. Gardening. Especially digging, because being sweaty and covered in dirt is really distracting.
6. Reading works by and/or about other trans* folks. Being a transsexual, I am partial to the old school transsexual memoir (Alesha Brevard’s The Woman I Was Not Born To Be is a favorite). However, there’s lots of good stuff beyond that, especially on the Internet. I really like everything Thomas Page McBee writes, because he is full of good thoughts about gender and life.
7. Reading Harry Potter, but that’s mostly because that always makes me feel better.
8. Wearing a shirt that is way too big. Hides all the things!
9. For social/out and about in public dysphoria, wearing a jacket and tie tends to obliterate the “ma’am” problem.
10. Sticking my head under the faucet in the sink. I have no idea why this helps. Maybe it’s just distracting.
11. Shaving my head. It’s remarkable I ever have hair, really. It was the easiest way to avoid dealing with Gender Hair Issues, and is also an absorbing activity.
12. Shining my shoes. I had the shiniest damn shoes in the world for a while.
13. Wandering around the hardware store. There are so many kinds of glue. I defy you to successfully think about anything else while trying to figure out the difference between Superglue and Krazyglue. (Answer: Krazyglue comes in that damn little-dot-making applicator tube that is proof we live in a fallen world. Superglue comes in a sensible tube and was invented as a surgical adhesive.)
14. Listening to angry music. Pick anything, as long as its central thesis can be distilled into either “I HATE EVERYTHING” or “FUCK THIS”